I've had it up to HERE!

16:38 Shrija
Forget it

This other friend knows

I'll ask him

I WANNA LEARN SO MUCH!

16:39 *xx*

on guitar rtie....

16:39 Shrija
Yeah, but I suck at instruments

I mean, musical ones. O.o


~~~
I just signed out after that.
ME AND MY STUPID.. WELL, I CAN'T SAY MOUTH, BUT YES!
ME AND MY STUPID SELF!!!
I must be kept in solitary confinement.
I mean, trust me to go and ruin a COMPLETELY normal situation.
And I wouldn't even have SAID that if I hadn't seen Penelope. You know, that stupid instrument joke her mum makes?

I COULD KILL RIGHT NOW!

And if that's not enough, the whole make-Shrija-a-girl-SOMEHOW project has begun. YET again. This time, with FULL FORCE.
I just CAN'T STAND IT! Both my grandmum's, they KEEP dropping this little hints as to "how girls should be" and how they "personally like girls who are lithe and pretty and tender and shy" and how I musn't work out cuz I'd "become like THAT".
That WHAT?! You can't sprout huge biceps just cuz you work out, OK?! And even if I did, so WHAT?!

I'm NOT their kind of girl. I just am NOT.
I never was.
And my dad is SO proud of me, and my bone structure, and my height, and everything. Cuz I inherited it all from him!
But both my grandmum's?
I KNOW I'm a terrible disappointment. I KNOW they didn't really want an ungirl for a granddaughter.
But this is how I AM.
This is how I will be.
Socially inept, awkward, "manly"(at least, not ladylike) -- that's all me. I CAN'T be the demure little girl. But I try to. BELIEVE me, I do. I socialize, each year, and do EVERYTHING to try and please them.
But in the end, I'm always going to be a T shirt and shorts kinda girl.
Just as I am now.
So I could do very well without all those stupid hints, thank you very much.

Right now, I'd like nothing more than to cardio this feeling into pulp.

:/